Small things make a big difference: How N.W.T. sisters cope with lockdown of special care home

Patti-Kay Hamilton is accustomed to seeing her sister every day, though Annie Hamilton doesn't recognize her anymore.

Annie, who has Down syndrome and Alzheimer's disease, has lived at the Northern Lights Special Care Home in Fort Smith, N.W.T., for about five years. Patti-Kay, a former radio producer with CBC North, believes Annie takes comfort in seeing her.

But since Northern Lights banned guests to protect against COVID-19, Hamilton's daily visits have had to stop.

"I have to trust and I have to humble myself and know that [the staff] will make her feel safe and comfortable, but it is hard for me," Patti-Kay told Loren McGinnis on CBC'sThe Trailbreaker in early April. "My selfish part of me wants to be there to kick and scream and get myself in the door again."

Patti-Kay is among countless people separated from loved ones as COVID-19 triggers lockdowns at assisted living residences across Canada.

"It is hard," said Patti-Kay. "It is difficult not to be able to see her, but I feel good because the people who are in there are her family now."

Before its blanket ban on visitors, and even as Northern Lights began tightening up restrictions overthe pandemic, Patti-Kay would go in to help her sister eat meals. It freed up time for staff to care for other residents, she said.

"There was an exemption for people who were in palliative or basically end-of-life care, and the director allowed me to go in and I was careful," said Patti-Kay. "But then I just felt wrong about it because I'm around people a lot.... I just thought 'no, I'm putting other people at risk, even if I'm super super careful.'"

I'm putting other people at risk, even if I'm super super careful.- Patti-Kay Hamilton

Since then, staff at the home have helped the sisters stay connected.

One staff member even used her own cellphone data to help Annie make a call through the video chat app FaceTime, said Patti-Kay.

"Small things like that make a big difference to family who can't get inside."

Patti-Kay said being in the North, where communities are small, helps. It means fewer degrees of separation, if any, between the people who work in long-term care homes and family members on the outside.

"We see them walking home after a shift and they'll stop and say, in my case, 'Annie's doing good. There's been no change. She's healthy. We're checking. We're looking and making sure she doesn't get sick,'" said Patti-Kay.

"At these huge facilities that you see in cities, they don't have that same experience. They don't walk down the street and see somebody they're related to or know who can say, 'it's OK. It's all right. We're doing what we do, we're taking care of that person."