A year has passed since the extremely awkward Academy Awards moment when presenters mistakenly named La La Land as 2016s Best Picture. Although Moonlight ultimately emerged victorious, director Barry Jenkins still hasnt gotten over the shock.

Jenkins told the Hollywood Reporter that the history-making Oscars flub made him question whether or not Moonlight was, in fact, the evenings real winner. He said he was so distraught by the way his films win played out at the ceremony, he continues to have a difficult time celebrating its success.

I wasnt sure that thing was mine or who it belonged to because of how everything happened, he revealed in a Feb. 23 discussion with fellow black Best Director nominees John Singleton, Lee Daniels and Jordan Peele. Its bittersweet because when that switch happened, I didnt enjoy it ... And it made 2017 a very long year.

The director said hed come to terms with his films loss even before presenters Warren Beatty and Faye Dunaway erroneously announced La La Land as the winner.

For two minutes, we lost, he said. Pointing to his forthcoming film, If Beale Street Could Talk , as well as a new series about the Underground Railroad hes developing at Amazon , he added, And in those two minutes, I was still self-satisfied because I knew Im going to go off and do these things, you know? Winning or losing is not gonna take any of those things off the table.

Jenkins stressed that he didnt make Moonlight which depicts a queer, black latchkey kids sexual awakening in the Miami projects and was unanimously praised for humanizing marginalized voices for the awards conversation.

The experience, however, has him somewhat jaded by the prospect of future nominations.

Im never going to get the opportunity to enjoy that because even if it happens again, it wont be the same, he said. Moonlight was a very special film for me.