I dont remember the first time I made myself sick. But what I do remember was the buildup to it. From the age of 11, I was relentlessly bullied. It was obvious to my fellow pupils that I was different for a variety of reasons. I was bright and studious, and it was apparent that I could be gay, although I had no idea of my sexuliaty until I was a bit older.

Midway through high school, the bullying was beginning to take a toll on me. Id walk out of class or avoid going completely and hide in the boys bathroom, the only safe space where I knew I wouldnt be found.

Out of sight, Id lock myself into a toilet cubicle where Id comfort-eat the contents of my lunchbox usually biscuits and chips. Feeling disgusted with myself, my instinct was to get the food out of me by sticking my fingers down my throat and vomiting. The buildup of tension and anxiety was flushed down the toilet, giving me an immense sense of relief.

This cycle of binging and purging became my coping mechanism for several years. As the bullying got worse, my episodes became more regular and frantic.