No, Do Not Roast Marshmallows Over Hawaiis Erupting Volcano, Says USGS

Lava smores arent such a hot idea.

On Monday, the U.S. Geological Surveys Twitter account took a break from posting updates about Hawaiis Kilauea volcanic eruption to respond to a silly question about snacks.

Is it safe to roast marshmallows over volcanic vents? asked Twitter user Jay Furr, who was presumably joking. Assuming you had a long enough stick, that is? Or would the resulting marshmallows be poisonous?

@USGSVolcanoes Is it safe to roast marshmallows over volcanic vents? Assuming you had a long enough stick, that is? Or would the resulting marshmallows be poisonous? @JimGriffith_SV @DrFunkySpoon

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@USGSVolcanoes Is it safe to roast marshmallows over volcanic vents? Assuming you had a long enough stick, that is? Or would the resulting marshmallows be poisonous? @JimGriffith_SV @DrFunkySpoon
Jay Furr (@jayfurr) May 29, 2018

Erm, the USGS replied. Were going to have to say no, thats not safe. (Please dont try!)

Erm...we're going to have to say no, that's not safe. (Please don't try!) If the vent is emitting a lot of SO2 or H2S, they would taste BAD. And if you add sulfuric acid (in vog, for example) to sugar, you get a pretty spectacular reaction.

USGS Volcanoes (@USGSVolcanoes) May 29, 2018","type":"rich","meta":{"author":"USGS Volcanoes","author_url":"https://twitter.com/USGSVolcanoes","cache_age":86400,"description":"Erm...we're going to have to say no, that's not safe. (Please don't try!) If the vent is emitting a lot of SO2 or H2S, they would taste BAD. And if you add sulfuric acid (in vog, for example) to sugar, you get a pretty spectacular reaction. 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Erm...we're going to have to say no, that's not safe. (Please don't try!) If the vent is emitting a lot of SO2 or H2S, they would taste BAD. And if you add sulfuric acid (in vog, for example) to sugar, you get a pretty spectacular reaction.
USGS Volcanoes (@USGSVolcanoes) May 29, 2018

Not only does the idea of cooking over scorching molten rocks seem extremely unsafe, the USGS said that the marshmallows wouldnt even taste good if the vents were emitting hydrogen sulfide or sulfur dioxide. The agency also noted that if you add sulfuric acid to sugar, you get a pretty spectacular reaction.

And in case you were curious as to what this spectacular reaction would look like , heres a sample:

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Yum.

Thankfully, there have no reports of fools toasting confections over a giant rock that spews fire since the agency answered the users question.

Thanks for your good work, USGS.

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