Amanda Peet doesnt shy away from discussing some of the tougher aspects of motherhood.

The actor and her husband, David Benioff , have three children Frankie, Molly and Henry. Since becoming a mom in 2007, shes shared her experience with work-life balance, postpartum depression and the challenging conversations she sometimes has with her kids.

In honor of her Jan. 11 birthday, here are 13 quotes about parenthood from Peet.

On Realistic Depictions Of Parenthood

Im a mom, and I remember when I first had Frankie and some of my friends were becoming moms at the same time, and some people said to me: Doesnt it just put everything in perspective? And I was like, No. [Laughs] Im still really competitive and ambitious and really petty. So I appreciate the way the Duplasses talk about parenting and family and midlife. Its an accurate perception, for me.

On Putting On Her Own Oxygen Mask First

Its a good metaphor for parenting, but its really hard to do sometimes. A lot of women feel that if theyre exerting energy in different areas of their life its automatically detrimental to the child. I think the exact opposite is true. Children need to have a role model who is able to identify her passions and go after them. Sometimes I feel guilty about making time for my friends, but thats a good model for Frankie, and its poignant to me because shes a girl. Its important for her to know that when I leave her, its to go see someone who needs me. That I have to stay on the phone right at that moment because Im checking with a friend whos opening a play or something like that.

On Control

One surprise of motherhood for me was how little control I have. I thought it would be an extended, blissful romance with me at the helm, cuddling this little creature to life. Its been bittersweet and humbling to let her lead, and to try not to be perfect myself.

On Teaching Her Daughter About Failure

I have moments where Im incredibly spontaneous and incredibly certain about a route we should be taking. And other times, Im completely paralyzed and I call my sister and mom and I talk to one of [Frankies] teachers and to my girlfriends ... I think its important for her to know that you can fail and then recover and that its so corny but that failure is important. Its part of the thing. You cannot escape it . Theres nothing you can do. Theres no way you can control everything that much.