5 Things I Wish I Knew Before Becoming A Dad

1. You have never been tired before.

Not like this level of sheer exhaustion. Imagine a car with no fuel, and a hole in the tank, and someone threw up on the hood. Oh and it has to continue driving everyday, up hills, with a brand new trailer. That's you. Get sleep now because it's going to be a while.

2. You're going to see some messed up things. Black poo, green poo, poo explosions, days when you wish there was just a bit of poo, but none comes and you don't know why.

3. You have never known responsibility like this. Like when you got your new phone and it was perfect. So you put a screen protector and found the ideal case to keep it pristine. Except this a tiny screaming human that is now your sole purpose to keep alive. It's going to fall, get scrapes and bruises and there's nothing you can do to help it. Scary right?

4. Every time you leave the house with your new baby, is a huge achievement. Some people will look at you with resentment for coming into their previously serene space, but nuts to them. Most others will want to say hi, squeeze cheeks and ask you about your offspring. Spend time with those people, theyre good people.

5. You have never known love like it. Sure there's the love you have for your parents, siblings, partner, but this little thing, this helpless, wriggly, stinky little creature is all yours and, without knowing you or your flaws, truly loves you.