Donald Trump's 100 Day Accomplishments, By the Numbers

By: Marty Rudoy, Goodyear Satire Co.

Tax dollars spent commuting DJT to Mar-a-Lago to play 10 rounds of golf: $21 million

Number of national security meetings held in restaurant non-smoking sections: 1

Percentage of Muslim bans enjoined by courts: 100

Linear feet of Beautiful Border Wall Completed: 0

Minimum Number of unregistered foreign agents to have served in Cabinet: 2

Sales of Ivanka-wear at Nordstroms in Trumps first 100 Days: $0

Percentage of Trump National Security Advisers Who Have Been Fired: 50

Number of People at Dinner where Botched Yemen Raid was Authorized: 8

Number of Dictators Complimented by DJT: 4

Percentage of 46 fired US Attorneys who have been replaced: 0

Dollars paid in fraud damages while President: 25,000,000

Number of Syrian airport gift shops destroyed by 59 Cruise missiles: 1

Number of Syrian Runways destroyed by 59 Cruise missiles: 0

Number of Hillary Clintons locked up: 0.

Number of Trump Cabinet Members Who May Be Locked Up: 5

Percentage of 576 key jobs requiring Senate approval still unfilled: 82

Jobs created by Presidential Action: 2 (Jared, Ivanka)

Amount of Foreign Payments that Michael Flynn Failed to Report, in Rubles: 32,323,107

Percentage of Russian sanctions eliminated in first 100 days: 0

Percentage of sentences spoken which were complete with subject, verb, object: 0

Number of Obamacares repealed: 0

Number of Obamacares replaced: 0