How To Keep Calm During Your Kids Competition

The stress and anxiety of watching their daughter compete in the 2016 Summer Olympics made Lynn and Rick Raisman internet sensations.  Their agonistic movements in the stands while daughter Aly Raisman competed in the women’s gymnastic team’s qualifying round in Rio captured the camera’s attention and will forever live in the GIF hall of fame.  

But it struck a chord with many parents who can identify with the stress, nervousness and anxiety of watching their children participate in competitive sports.  I created created this helpful acronym to help moms and dads cope. 

 Fittingly, my guide to keep calm is called P.A.R.E.N.T.

Perspective. When we get anxious about something, we need to be able to zoom out and put it into perspective. From performance standpoint, the Olympics are a big deal, but it isn’t curing cancer. Appreciate and absorb the opportunity.

Acceptance. Acceptance of the reality that there’s a chance we will get a little nervous and experience anxiety.  Accept that whether a performance is good or bad and we should still love our kids unconditionally.

Realistic. Be realistic in the outcome of a competition. In the case of Raisman’s parents, cringing and looking away is not going to have an impact on if their daughter performs well. We need to realize that things could go either way and be positive.  The same applies for parents of any sport, like pee wee football.  In the 4th grade, a child may not be the next Emmitt Smith, but they go have a long way to go and a future ahead of them.

Embrace the moment. The Olympic games are as big as it gets. But with our kids in general, embrace the opportunity to watch them participate in a sport. Embrace that they’ve got the ability to complete. Don’t overthink or overanalyze things.

Non-judgment. Whether a child performs well or not, accept it as it is. Be non-judgmental towards yourself and give your kids credit.  Don’t base your love for them on their performance.

Talk it out. Be able to discuss your anxiety. Talk to someone about how much anxiety you are experiencing.  It will help you process things and make it more manageable. Parents may not know how their children want them to react while watching in the stands.  If you have a conversation and talk it out with your kids, you can understand how they want you to respond.  Kids will tell you what they prefer and you can go with that for a while and see how it works out.