Oprah For President? A Resounding, If Respectful, No

If youre my age and you remember Rowan and Martins Laugh-In, you might possibly remember a moment in the party scene where Dan asked a body-painted, Watusi-dancing, teenie-bikini wearing (hey, it was the late 1960s) Goldie Hawn whether she believed in capital punishment.

Yes, she replied, deadpan. I think everyone in the Capitol should be punished.

Well, half a century later, she got her wish everyone in the Capitol was indeed spanked.

The 2016 election, of course, was the Year of the Outsider, as an electorate disgusted with the entire political class repudiated business-as-usual Washington.

Thus we ended up with a President who had never served in office before, and Hillary Clinton fending off a huge challenge from Bernie Sanders , who captured the imagination of the electorate as did past outsiders like Clean Gene McCarthy, Ralph Nader, and Ross Perot.

And now, accelerated by her powerful Golden Globes speech last night, comes Oprah, the sudden front runner for the Democratic Presidential nomination in 2020.

Meryl Streep, last seen on Capital Hill lecturing Congress about the dangers of Alar, enthusiastically told the Washington Post last night that when it comes to running for President, Oprah doesnt have a choice. Yes, she does.

And I hope she chooses not to run.

The headlines this week have been full of the Michael Wolff account of the early months of the current Presidency, with predictable results.

The Left sees the book as proof that our Chief Executive is unhinged.

The Right sees the book as proof that the Left will stop at nothing to derail a conservative agenda.

They both might be correct.

And so both sides are looking to 2020, to see who will run.

Im hoping that whoever runs on either side, that person is a seasoned politician better yet, a statesman or stateswoman, if any can be found.

Ideally, those candidates should be suitably chastened by the desire of the electorate to punish everyone in the Capitol, as Goldie Hawn had proposed so long ago.

That person needs to know which Korea we like and which we dont.

The realities of foreign relations.

How our economy works.

What the Constitution contains.

And so on.

I dont really want to go through another year or so of on-the-job training while a celebrity, even one as capable and beloved as Oprah, goes to work in the Oval Office.

Various other celebs and business leaders are looking at the current incumbent and saying, Why not me?

Because you arent qualified. Thats why not.

Running the Free World should be more than about a persons Q rating.

So guess what, America.

No more celebrities.

Im hoping that the political class has indeed learned from the rise of Bernie Sanders and President Trump that the electorate wants no more of politics as usual.

We want something better.

But that doesnt mean we want someone famous.

And Oprah, that includes you.

I dont want to take anything away from Oprah Winfrey -- how talented she is, her own amazing life story and business career, and how she has transformed the lives of our entire nation.

But I just dont want any more celebrities in the Oval Office, unless theyre there to pay a visit and pick up some nice cufflinks.

Sometimes in our society, if enough people get together and say an idea is a good idea, then everyone agrees its a good idea.

Even if its a bad idea.

Thats one of the downsides of social media the velocity of bad ideas approaches the speed of light.

So here I am to say, lets yank the brakes on this particular crazy train before it rolls too far out of the station.

People might say, Well, Ronald Reagan came from Hollywood.

Yes, with two terms as Governor of California along the way to the White House.

And please dont write in and tell me Im racist or sexist because I dont want Oprah.

I voted twice for Barack Obama , brought my kids to the polling place in 2008 so that they could see their father helping to make history by electing an African American President, and even raised funds for Obama online that year.

(Okay, not thrilled with the results, but you get my point.)

Sexist? Nope. I could have lived with a Hillary Clinton Presidency, and if I had my druthers, next time around Nikki Haley will be top of the ticket.

But no to Oprah, no to Disneys Bob Iger, no to Starbucks Howard Schultz, no to Kanye West, no to Dwayne The Rock Johnson, no to Katy Perry, no to Mark Cuban, no to Tom Hanks, and a special double no to Mark Zuckerberg.

Of course, this leaves the field open to, well, me, and Im tanned, ready, and rested in case my nation needs me.

It wont, and it doesnt need any more amateurs, especially those with good intentions, because we all know where good intentions lead.

On second thought, if Goldie Hawns available, maybe she should run. She understands what Washington needs better than any of us.