'Family Guy' Nails The Hilarious Way Every Pizza Place Ruins Salad

If you’ve ever eaten a house salad from a pizza delivery joint, you’ve realized that your attempt to add balance to your meal was a huge mistake. 

“Family Guy” feels your pain. In a 2011 clip from the show’s 10th season, a cutaway gag reveals how every pizza place salad is made. And boy, do they nail it.

After throwing in an entire head of lettuce, a can of whole black olives, a large tomato cut into thirds so it’s “big enough to pretend you’ve got red teeth,” one long slice of carrot and a lot of spicy peppers, the “Every Pizza Place” salad is ready to go.

But you can’t disregard the pizza man’s crucial delivery instructions: “Oh, and make sure to stick it right on top of the pizza so it stays nice and warm.” 

The old clip surfaced last month on Reddit, and users were quick to share their own pizza place salad horror stories.

“I ordered their Italian garden salad because it sounded unobtrusive enough,” Reddit user Beefwich wrote in a comment. “It came damn near exactly like this but instead of one carrot shaving, it was like someone mulched 4 carrots into thin ribbons, wadded it into a fist-size ball and wedged it right in the middle like some sort of sick centerpiece.”

Another Redditor shared the photo below, commenting, “This is leftovers from dinner last night at my local pizza restaurant. It fits the description.”

While some pizza places do offer delicious salads, it’s never a bad idea to order what pizzerias make best: hot, cheesy pizza goodness.