Rush Limbaugh No Longer a Big Fat Idiot, New Study Says

With the number of American men and women with big-bellied, pear-shaped figures reaching alarming rates over the past decade, one bright spot is that plus-size conservative radio personality Rush Limbaugh is no longer a big fat idiot, according to a new government study on obesity.

"The increase in the number of people with abdominal obesity -- the most dangerous kind of obesity -- is alarming," said Earl Ford, a researcher with the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and the study's lead author. "However, I am pleased to report that Rush Limbaugh is no longer a big fat idiot. Our data supports that with the epidemic in abdominal obesity, Rush Limbaugh can now be classified as a moderately fat idiot."

While the study's findings may be somewhat good news for the polarizing radio personality, Ford continued, it does not bode as well for the rest of Americans.

"Instead of trimming down over the past decade, we found that the U.S. waistline is instead rapidly approaching the girth of Rush Limbaugh's," Ford said. "I guess you could say we are now all big fat idiots."

People whose fat has settled mostly around their waistlines instead of their hips, thighs and buttocks run a higher risk of heart disease, diabetes and other obesity-related ailments. Abdominal obesity is defined as a waistline of more than 35 inches in women and more than 40 inches in men.

Ford said that Limbaugh was not part of the study on abdominal obesity, but he judged his findings partly on recent photographs of the portly radio personality.