Viola Davis Wins! Apple Ad Brings Joy! -- Hollywood, Are You Paying Attention?

Viola Davis wins! Since Sunday night, social media has featured a non-stop love-fest for Viola Davis and the other black women who won Emmy Awards that evening, including Regina King and Uzo Aduba. Not only that, Apple released an ad featuring Kerri Washington, Mary J. Blige and Taraji P. Henson, with no cursing, backbiting or craziness! Just laughing, dancing and celebrating the way that so many girlfriends do in real life.

It is now undeniable and fully-documented on social media and being discussed in coffee houses all over America -- black women and so much of the American public, in general, were ecstatic to see these black actresses celebrating and supporting one another in what is often portrayed as a cutthroat industry.

This is particularly meaningful considering that a whole generation is growing up on reality shows that depict all black women as being profanity-spewing, fist-fighting, disloyal, and embittered toward one another; as competitors and adversaries, and rarely as companions or allies.

As Viola Davis alludes to in her speech, there are so few roles for black women on TV and in the movies in the first place, and far too many of those that exist portray black women continually going for the lowest common denominator. Sadly, in my work, when conducting workshops, I have often heard African-American teenaged boys and girls say things like, "Well, you know all black girls fight," or "that's why I don't date black girls, they are 'ratchet'" (a word I can barely stand to hear these days and never allow my sons to say in my presence).

In fact, recently, when seated at a breakfast with other black mothers whom I like and respect a great deal, I was so disappointed to hear some of them stereotyping black girls (which we all used to be) in such negative ways. Some mothers actually declared, with no trace of irony, that they don't necessarily encourage their sons to date black girls because, "You know all black girls have attitudes", as if to suggest that "other" girls don't have "attitudes," and that somehow millions of girls can be characterized by the color of their skin -- something we have all fought against for most of our lives.

I have three sons. But to hear some of the mothers' statements and underlying sentiment hurt and concerned me as a black woman. I thought of my goddaughters, my nieces and my friends' beautiful daughters -- girls who are lovely, brilliant, funny; some of whom are shy and demure, others extroverted and witty; and a few that probably do have "attitude" because of who they are, not because of the the amount of their melanin in their skin -- and knowing they may never find dates or mates because not only has Hollywood often written them off, but there are actually black mothers who have internalized these images and are confirming these biases to their sons during their sons' formative years.

Now, let's be clear -- media images are only one part of the problem. Yet, the fact that these stereotypes have become so ingrained through mass media storytelling, even in the minds of black people, suggests that the degree to which negative images are damaging the very fiber of the fabric of our collective consciousness.

So, what a joy and relief to see REAL LIFE (not a scripted "reality") unfold in front of our eyes on Sunday night as black women embraced, and rooted and cheered for one another in front of America and the world's ever-peering eyes. It rang so true to me. These are the stories we never see. I know I would not have made it without the loving, selfless, joyful presence and support of my closest friends -- black women just like me, each of us blessed with our individual personality and all of whom support one another and celebrate our individual successes with collective praise.

In summary: advertisers, producers, directors, writers, Hollywood -- take note!

There are countless numbers of potential viewers whom you are missing. Many of us refuse to watch the negative hack jobs that so many of the "reality tv" black women roles represent. However, we would applaud and support programming that reflects the reality of black women's lives that we saw a glimpse of in these two instances (EMMY Award Show and New Apple Ad) if you could suspend your bias long enough to show more of it. We have many different stories -- many of which are positive.

We want to see black women characters who reflect like the full range of who we are -- not just relegated to the sidekick, oversexed vixen, cursing, crazy caricature or stereotypical angry black woman role. (I will note that I was deeply disappointed that Tina Fey, whose work I generally appreciate, had taken the low road by employing the angry black woman clich at the end of her original Netflix series, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt.)

The initial responses flooding social media in response to Viola Davis' speech, the black actresses' mutual support of each other and the Apple commercial demonstrate that many of Americans are hungry for more real, substantive and nuanced characters that portray the full breadth of who we are. (Thank you to Ava Duvernay for directing the Apple ad -- it's a gem!) We have had more than enough of the contrived and one-dimensional characters that are the product of the artistically slanted, culturally uninformed and/or the racially biased, offensive perspectives.

Sunday night's Emmy Awards Show and Apple's new ad should be just the beginning. It's time for Hollywood to step up and for the viewing audience to step up to demand more positive, "Real" images like these. As Viola Davis said so eloquently, "You cannot win an Emmy for roles that are simply not there."